4. Jesus Needs His Medication
Prior to this episode, Phil has been portrayed as a bearded hippie/zen Jesus, but then the edit changed almost as erratically as Phil’s behavior. Jiana explains that Phil has been diagnosed with ADHD (from H2T, presumably) and he can’t help but be a crazy pants.
Speaking of crazy pants, Phil has let himself into the Guess Closet to try on some strange-looking pants. In the process, he pesters Jiana, touches all of the clothes, and compliments his own butt. Cory, who won the right to “shop” in the closet is annoyed that Phil invited himself in and is all, “Oh my [son of] God! You have ADHD! Get out!” There are some easy jokes that can be made about how Cory wants Phil to come out of the closet, but - in truth - I assume that Baldy wants Phil’s weave more than his body.
Phil gets jittery again later at a challenge. He puts on a plain black shirt and then says, “I feel like an absolute fool right now! I feel like a clown!” [Somewhere, Kanani is crying.] So how does he make himself look like less of a fool? He takes it upon himself to cut the sleeves off of a designer shirt. Because, you know, everyone looks less silly in a homemade sleeveless shirt.
Even if that was an expensive shirt, it’s worth it to watch Kelly Cutrone nearly have a stroke. She yells at him and makes him change, before earnestly groaning, “Look clean, my god!” Chill, Kelly, I’m sure Phil can duct tape the sleeves back on. It’s pretty enjoyable watching Kelly shudder anytime she’s near Phil; it’s as if she’s afraid she’s going to catch fleas.
With a new shirt on, Phil is still overly excited and starts running around in the background of his team’s photo. Cory has a diva moment and explains that running isn’t high fashion, but I think Tyra might disagree given Cycle 5’s treadmill photo shoot and Cycle 15’s treadmill runway.
Alas, the running is not enough to reduce Phil’s energy. He tries sitting on a fence, he falls off the fence, and then he gets so angry that he wildly chucks a large stick he’s been holding. That stick strikes another portion of the fence about 30 yards away and breaks it.
Okay, sure, in the moment, he looks crazier than ever, but in Phil’s de-fence (get it? because he just basically de-fenced), I offer these excuses:
It was retaliation. The fence did provoke the attack by knocking Phil off first.
The last time Jesus was around a structure made of wood and nails, he was crucified on it, so I’m sure he’s not acting with a clear head.
Jesus was a carpenter, right? Phil will have no problem repairing the fence. Maybe Marvin’s dad could come help clean up, too.
I look forward to seeing more of Phil’s spazzed out adventures in the future. At least the ADHD finally explains why Phil can’t stay focused on just one woman at a time. (But seriously, Zoe, honey, if he tries to use that excuse on you, do NOT buy it.)
Funniest Moments of ANTM Cycle 20, ep 7
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